i couldnt handle it anymore.
so i finally did it.
after all the annoying moments i enured, and aggrivating text messages, and emails... i finally did it.
i cut the ties.
god im such a bitch.
it hurts me that i hurt someone.
no really, it does. he told me he was in love with me tonight... like i knew he eventually would. just so happens that he told me that after all the yelling at him i did.
it wouldnt be right of me to keep him around to take me on a date when feeling lonely, or come watch movies and cuddle when im sad and want attention.
i could easily continue to do that.
but no, fuck that. thats fucked up.
i cant use people like that, because IVE BEEN used like that before. and it sucks.
however, hes such a nice guy, and so caring. yet - so insecure that its unlike any male of age 25.
ugh.
i just feel so lame.
but ya know what ... its better this way.
he promised he doesnt hate me, and as long as i dont hate him, hes okay with that... he said his 2 biggest fears were drowning, and having me hate him...
man... this is shitty.
but i know i did the right thing..
maybe i'll continue this later -

[p.s.- jake is here in 4 days. get excited.]